


Chats on the roof

by kceniya



Category: True Blood
Genre: true blood - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-18
Updated: 2013-03-18
Packaged: 2017-12-05 18:05:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/726248
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kceniya/pseuds/kceniya





	Chats on the roof

Chats on the roof

 

‘Remind me why are we here?’

‘We are enjoying ourselves and that’s it. ’

‘Do you really think this is the right place to be enjoying ourselves? ’

‘Maybe, at least no one can disturb us here. My f@ing job…’ 

‘Yeah, your f@ing job! Why can’t you just leave it? ’

‘You know I can not. No one can retire until his true death. That is my burden.’ 

‘Please don’t speak like that! I don’t want to hear about death! I want you to live! ’

‘I am not alive technically,’ he laughed softly.

‘You are alive for me! I want you to be with me forever.’ 

‘Do not pretend to be more naive then you are, dear. Everyone dies sooner or later. We have done it once already. We’ve got a second chance and it is not so frightening now as it is for the first time. To tell you the truth, it is not a problem for me at all. I have been ready for a long time.’ 

‘Don’t! Don’t even think that way! Don’t you do this to me! ’ she cried out loudly.

There, there,’ he stroked her head gently, ‘I am not going to do this right now. I am not going to give up. But there are so many risks and dangers around. Many times I was near the edge. So I am telling you, I want you to be ready for anything. That is all. ’ 

I can feel your pain,’ she gasped, ‘I don’t want you to feel like this. Please tell me what can I do to make you feel better? ’

‘I am so sorry. You can do nothing. You have done so much, the pain is bearable now because of you.’  
‘I wish I could do more.’  
‘But you know you can not. The only thing I can propose is to release you. I’ve given you everything I could. There is nothing more I can teach you. You are a self-sufficient person now. I think you are ready to go your own way. And you will not feel my pain any more.’

‘Shut the f@ck up! I don’t want to hear this!’ she put her hands over her ears ‘I don’t want to be alone! It is even worse than being with you!’ 

‘Oh, thank you,’ his voice was full of irony, ‘So I am doomed to be with you till the end of my life? It is so sweet of you!’

‘Yes, I’ll never let you get rid of me. I am your punishment, don’t you remember?’

‘How can I forget? ’ he sighed ‘You are my punishment but I like it so much. I think I’ve become a masochist. And I am a f@ing shit Maker.’ 

‘No you are not! I was an idiot then and I‘m so sorry for this!’

‘Do not be sorry. It is a bitter truth. I was not a good Maker for you. I tried to release you because I was afraid of this responsibility. And I could not protect you when you were in a great danger. We can not deny obvious facts. All I am doing now is trying to redeem my faults.’ 

‘You are so boring when talking like this! You sound like an old man!’

‘I am an old man. Compared to you at least, I am old.’

‘Shut up then, Daddy,’ she chuckled and punched him in the shoulder lightly.

They were silent for a while lying on the roof of his mansion and staring up in to the dark sky.

‘Do you like stars?’ 

‘Yes. I like watching the stars and the moon. They remind me the sun.’

‘I can still remember it dimly. I don’t know why. So little time has passed and I can hardly imagine it in my head. Why is it so? Is it because of our nature?’  
‘I don’t know, dear. I think it is not because of our nature. We just forget everything good too fast just as humans do. I have not seen the sun for almost one and a half centuries. But twice recently I walked in the sun.’

‘Uff! ’ She shivered, ‘I think it hurts so much.’

‘Yeah. The first time it was hell. Now I know what poor souls feel when they are burnt in hell. The touch of silver is as soft as a kitten’s paw in comparison to it. But the second time… It was awesome. It was a miracle. I felt myself a human again. I have no words to express my feelings. But it lasted only for two or three minutes.’

‘I wish I could feel the same now!’

‘And I do not,’ he smiled sadly, ‘The joy for me meant another human’s pain. Being in the sun means hurting or killing a Fae. The price is too high. If I had another chance I would never wish to do this to Sookie. Even if we do not intend to hurt the people we love, we still do so unwillingly. This is the curse of our nature. And we must fight hard against it. We can never be what people call “good” but we mustn’t be evil either.’

‘But why should we? We are not humans any more. Why can’t we be just what we are?’ 

‘And who are we? ’ he asked softly, ‘We are what we are. If you think that being a monster, as people believe us to be, is not a part of human nature then you are deeply mistaken. I know this. I was a monster. I did such awful things you can not even imagine. And then everything changed. I realized what I am and who I am. I was terrified when I looked inside myself and saw a real monster and saw that this monster was not something supernatural. It was me. It was the result of my own weakness and nihilism.’ 

‘And what did you do? How could you change from monster into human again?’

‘I did not change, dear. And I am not a human and will never be one. But I am not a monster now. Well, I hope I am not. I was a monster and the burden of this sin is forever with me. If I live to be ten thousand years old all the good I will have done will not make up for one single drop of innocent blood I have spilled.’

‘It sucks.’

‘Oh yeah!’ he laughed. ‘But it was my own choice so I do not complain.’ 

‘It’s hard not to be monster,’ she said thoughtfully.

‘It is. This is not an easy way. And there is no recompense in the end. Nobody is going to praise you. But if it is just the right way for me, so be it. You have to make your own choice which way to take. You are my Progeny but I will not make you do something you do not want. All I could do was to show you the dark evil side of our nature and the possibility of the fragile and delicate balance between evil and goodness. I will accept your decision.’

‘I don’t want to have more difficulties and I want my un-dead life to be easy,’ she said slowly and seeing his darkened face continued with a wide smile, ’But who said life is an easy thing? So I prefer to be in your team and to see how it all ends. And by the way I can always change my mind, can’t I?’

‘Of course you can. The fact is that we have to make our choice not once or twice but every moment of our life, deciding where to go or what to do.’ 

‘I’m going to crazy listening to you. You messed with my head!’

‘Ooops! Sorry! I’ll shut up now. We are just watching the stars…’

‘Aha.’

They were silent watching the stars dancing on the black velvet of the sky.

‘Look! A falling star!’

‘I see it, make a wish.’

‘I have never watched stars at night. I had to go to bed at nine o’clock with the curtains pulled. What is your wish?’

‘I have not made any. My wishes have a bad habit of coming true in unfortunate ways. Have you seen the “Wishmaster” movie? It is just my case.’ 

‘I’ve not seen any movies at all. We were not allowed to watch TV or go to the movies. But I’m curious about this “Wishmaster” now. By the way I wished you happiness.’

‘My dear girl,’ he felt such tenderness and gratitude. ’You are too kind. I do not deserve it.’ 

‘Everyone deserves to be happy. And you deserve it the most.’

‘Your wish came true then. I am happy now. I am happy that you are with me. Maybe I was wrong and the falling stars are really magic. I promise I will wish something for you when the next star falls.’

‘I don’t want anything else. I want nothing now. Just to be here and watching the stars. Can we do this again one day?’

‘Of course, anytime, dear.’

‘You are always so busy and have no time for your poor little Progeny.’ she sounded like a spoiled child.’

‘I promise I’ll always find a minute for you and for the stars. It is almost time for now. The dawn is coming. You should go home. Hoyt is probably worried.’

‘No, he knows I am safe with you. But you are right. It’s time to go home.’ 

He helped her on her feet.

‘Can we jump? Please!’

‘Ok. One, two, three!’

‘Wow! I wish I could learn to fly one day. It is awesome!’ 

‘I am sure you will. You are talented. One day you will totally overwhelm me and I will be the most proud Maker on the Earth.’

‘I’ll do my best. A hug for goodbye?’

‘Sure.’ 

‘See you later alligator.’

‘Hurry up. It is almost dawn. I feel the sun is near.’

‘No! You must say “In a while crocodile”!’

‘I know. This is silly. Kings don’t say that sort of thing.’

‘Don’t be pain in the neck!’

‘Ok, ok! In a while, my red-haired croc. Are you satisfied? Now go!’

‘Bye, Bill.’

‘Take care, dear.’

After she was gone he stood for a while on the porch smiling sadly and softly. 

‘I love you, my child. I love you so much, you brought sense into my life after I thought I had lost it forever.’ he whispered ‘God bless you, Jess.’


End file.
